Arrrrrgggh!

No, I am not a pirate. I am just very, very frustrated. As mentioned in my earlier blog post, I am in need of  a new laptop. I filed my taxes last night, so I officially gave myself permission to start seriously shopping. I started by checking top ten lists of laptop brands online. The brand of the laptop my mother received for Christmas came up near the top several times, so I decided that would be a good choice, but I looked through the reviews on an electronics store's website and the reviews were like night and day: either people loved their laptop or it had died on them two months in.

In addition to my confusion over the quality of the brand, I found that was easily confused just by the specifications of the laptops. I've come to realize that I know next to nothing about computers. How am I supposed to know which features are worth paying more money to get? I don't use my laptop for much  (writing, blogging, web surfing [though I've considered getting Photoshop sometime]), but I use it for long amounts of time, so it needs to be good for heavy use.

I think the reason I'm so frustrated is that usually I'm a very informed shopper. Whether it be clothing, food, books, movies... I know exactly what I'm looking for and can tell the quality of my prospective purchase. In the case of electronics, I am like a fish out of water. I am like a fish that got blown out of the water and stuck in front of a high-powered fan, imprisoned in the stocks!

Grrr. Anyway, if anyone has any pearls of wisdom to share, I would be super grateful. Please help me get back into the water!

Dear Boys of Yesteryear

So...I follow this awesome blog written by a girl named Elise. She does this thing called "dear boys" in which she writes notes to boys, with code names so we don't know who they are. She encourages others to take part in the "dear boys"-ing, but I've never done it because I don't know that many boys... Anyway, today was a blast from the past "dear boys" day, so I figured I'd give it a shot.

Here goes:

Dear Clueless,

Two-plus years and I don't think you ever realized I liked you. Oh, well. Over and done with, much to my friends' relief. The upside is that you were a really great friend.

 Peacefully moved on,
~Michelle

Dear Dark Ages,

Remember that time when you slowly moved from your side of the couch to mine? That was awkward, as were many other moments. I hope you used better moves to lure in your wife.

Enjoying the 20/20 of hindsight,
~Michelle

Dear Ralph,

You told me I was funny and I liked that. And I sort of miss how we used to sit near each other (but never together) in Sacrament meeting.

Sad I had to leave that ward,
Michelle

Dear Cleveland,

Thank you for never coming back into my workplace (so far). You were creepy and I don't really want to explain why I never called you...

Not your type,
Michelle

A Quick Note...

Hey, friends. I just thought I should throw out a quick explanation as to why I haven't blogged much as of late. The problem is that Chuck, my dear laptop, has been going downhill for a while now and he's making my computer-related life a little rough. It's quite sad, but, let's face it, it's been a long time coming. The poor guy is a double hand-me-down that started life as an inexpensive fill-in when my brother had his nicer laptop out to be fixed.

Chuck and I have made many fond memories together, but the time has come to move on. My plan is to get a new laptop with my tax return this year. I have lots of fun new ideas for my blog, but I can't really do any of them when Chuck here is slower than molasses and likely to freeze at any moment (and yes, I've done virus checks, etc.).

Anyway, just wanted to inform you all, since I know you've all been missing my cyber presence...or whatev.

The Tale of Frankenwatch

Disclaimer: you know you're a nerd when someone says Frankenstein and you think to yourself, What they really meant was Frankenstein's monster. In that same vein, there may be fellow nerds out there who may be tempted to comment that Frankenwatch should really be Frankenstein's Watch, but you would be wrong. A. Frankenstein didn't create this watch, I did. B. This is my blog, and I can take some poetic license if I want.

I was making my way through an average day at work when a customer approached me. She had been given a watch from our establishment as a Christmas gift, and the band was too small. I took possession of the watch and looked it over to see what could be done. I realized that the watch was one of our *ahem* less expensive watch brands, so I knew that the chance of getting extra links from the vendor was slim to none, especially considering that the watch had an expansion (read: stretch) band. Despite this, I decided to call anyway, thinking it would at least show the customer that I was willing to go the extra mile for them.

My suspicions were confirmed, at least partially. The customer service number was set up so poorly that I would only have been able to speak to someone if I knew their name. I managed to get to a general mailbox, which also instructed me to state a name before leaving a message. I left a message with my question, name, and work number in hopes that I would at least find out their policy at some point.

At this point, I was pretty much ready to apologize to the customer and tell her that I was unable to help her. Just before doing so, however, I remembered the watch graveyard. The watch graveyard lies in a drawer, appropriately enough, beneath a layer of watch tools. Contained within are dozens of watch bands and pieces of watch bands. Their appearance in that drawer stretches back into time immemorial, and they lay there for the sole purpose of letting we jewelry ladies practice our watch band skills. It occurred to me that if I were able to find links of the same size, I could help out my customer.

I proposed my plan to the customer, who approved, and got to work. Soon enough, I found a viable donor, er, a section of watch band that might work. It wasn't exactly the same color as the existing band, but it was close enough that it wouldn't be super noticeable, especially since links would be added to the underside of the watch.  I commenced my project, feeling incredibly excited at the prospect of creating a watch hybrid.

The operation proceeded normally: cap popped off, edges pulled back, staples removed. The moment of truth was upon me. Could I successfully connect two different watch bands? Holding the two ends together, I slipped one side together. The staple fit in both sides and the edge lined up. I lifted the final staple and slid it into place. It fit. I almost breathed a sigh of relief, but I then realized something horrible. The foreign watch band was thicker than the original, and the final staple had fit in, but the edges didn't line up. I attempted to finish the operation, hoping that maybe the watch would be able to hold itself together, but such was not the case. Sadly, I turned to the customer to admit my defeat. She was understanding and thanked me for trying. Somewhat anticlimactically, I returned to my tools and put the watch together to its original condition and handed it back to the customer, who suggested that the watch would probably eventually stretch out.

So that's it. Dreams broken. Aspirations crushed. Villagers safe for another day. Oh, wait, that was the original Frankenstein's monster...

The Obligatory New Year Post

I suppose I should chat for a while regarding a reflection of 2011. Last year was...so many things. Stressful, frustrating, gut-wrenchingly hard, but at the same time so much fun and so full of self-discovery. I went through a lot of trials last year, but every single one of them taught me something priceless. After all, no one ever learned anything worthwhile by taking the easy way out, eh?

On the other hand, I had a lot of incredible experiences. Since it's easier to discuss the things I have pictures from, I present to you my two awesome vacations.

I had the wonderful opportunity to travel to Nashville in order to attend my little brother's law school graduation. Nashville is beautiful, and Bret was a fantastic tour guide. This magnolia tree is one of the many trees on the Vanderbilt campus, which was so gorgeous. The campus is covered in trees, each of which is labeled so you know what kind it is.

It was so great to see my brother in the place he called home for three years. One of my favorite moments was going onto the roof of his apartment building at night and looking out at the Nashville skyline. Bret pointed out all the buildings he knew. It was so beautiful.

Of course, the highlight of the trip was watching my brother walk across that stage and become an official Vanderbilt Law graduate. He'd probably be annoyed that I'm about to say this, but I cried big fat tears of joy for that kid. I am so proud of him.

I love this picture of him after the graduation.

Highlight number two of the year: the exciting trip to Missouri/Nauvoo/a brief jaunt into Iowa one night to find a Wendy's. My dear friend Nikki and I journeyed to this distant land in order to celebrate the wedding of another good friend of ours, Miss Suzanne. Suzie actually introduced me to Nikki, and demanded, shortly before her return to her homeland, that we become friends. Guess what? We did! Anyway, our trip was super awesome. It was so great to see Suzie after so long, and to meet her somewhat goofy (but totally lovable) fiance. On the way to the wedding day, we visited Liberty Jail and Carthage Jail, and managed to squeeze in roughly half a day's worth of touring the city of Nauvoo. I'd love to go back and fully explore that city, but it was worth missing out on that to be able to attend Suzie and Keenan's sealing in the beautiful Nauvoo temple. It was such a wonderful experience. Here's a few pics from that adventure:

Please excuse my pink face; it was quite the humid day that day.

P.S. Isn't Suzie's dress incredible? Her sister-in-law made it and it was so very very pretty.

So that was my year in a nutshell. Overall, not too shabby for Michelle. I can't wait to see what will happen in 2012.

Finally, A Moment Of Rest

I have just completed my ninth retail Christmas. Many of you may say that I am mad, but such is my life. I've been at my current job for nearly eight years, and before that I worked several months at another store. Let me say this about Christmas in retail: it's a horrible, horrible experience. No matter how hard you try, any amount of Christmas spirit you may have is immediately squelched by the ridiculous hours and even more ridiculous customers attitudes and masses.  It's enough to make you start wondering things like, "If I somehow managed to break my leg, could I get time off work? Or would I just have to sit on a chair at a register?"


I long ago stopped getting especially excited for Christmas. I do get excited for gifts that I'm giving people. This year I made most of my gifts for friend and family, so I did have quite a bit of excitement in that area, but generally there isn't much to get me going. I know that's sad, but there it is. Working retail serves only to force disenchantment over the whole Christmas season.

The intent of this post, however, is not to complain. The intent is to describe the magic of Christmas and its ability to wipe all that away. The thing is, no matter how horrible the days leading up to Christmas are, matter how many terrible shifts I work or customers I want to punch in the face, Christmas Day is always perfect. The store is closed, so for one day, I don't have to worry about going in to work and putting on a happy face. I can just be with my family. All I have to worry about...is nothing.  I even have the time and mindset to thing about true meaning of Christmas.

I think a lot of the peace I feel on Christmas comes from the fact that there's suddenly a lot behind me. I know there's still a week or so of wild after-Christmas sales and telling irate customers that I can't return their fine jewelry without a receipt, but most of it is over. Soon the store will return to its calm, off-season demeanor, and I can't wait. When Christmas comes, I know that I've made it. And I only broke down and cried a couple of times :)


Aaaand...only 43 days until my trip to Disneyland!

I've Got the World on a String, or, Rather, a Shower Curtain

Confession: I sometimes fall prey to silly and irrational fears. Today's example: the possibility of a killer hiding behind my shower curtain. I'm sure most of you have heard people joking about checking behind the shower curtain before going to the bathroom to avoid being surprised by a crazed lunatic with a knife (it could happen!). Yes, I sometimes do this. Anyway, I was in the shower yesterday and the thought occurred to me, as it sometimes does, that someone could sneak into my bathroom and kill me in the shower (Psycho, anyone?).  As usually happens when this thought arises, I cursed my shower curtain for its opacity (is that a word? It should be).

This thought connected with the fact that I've been thinking about redecorating my bathroom for a while. I haven't been able to find a shower curtain that I really liked (granted, I'd only looked on walmart.com and in the store...). I decided that a clear-ish curtain might be a good choice, and then I remembered the world map.

When I visited my brother in Nashville a few months back, I discovered that his apartment featured a shower curtain with a colorful map of the world printed on it. I thought this was pretty awesome, plus educational. In addition, my brother told me that, occasionally, when discussing a particular place and becoming mystified as to its location, either he or his roommate would shout out "To the Map Room!", at which point the two men would enter the bathroom to ascertain the location of the place in question. I just think that's awesome.

And so my journey began. It ended up being an incredibly short journey, as I went to the Target website first and discovered the shower curtain in question on the first page of shower curtains. I placed the curtain in my virtual shopping cart, selected some new curtain rings (my old ones are getting...well, you know), and ordered! I now await the arrival of this beauty:

Isn't is awesome? (This image, of course, belongs to Target.)

And don't worry; I know that this is potentially kind of cheesy. I have plans to keep it classy, or as classy as a world map shower curtain can be... Either way, I'm super excited and looking forward to the day that I can call out "To the Map Room!"