Here goes:
Dear Clueless,
Two-plus years and I don't think you ever realized I liked you. Oh, well. Over and done with, much to my friends' relief. The upside is that you were a really great friend.
Peacefully moved on,
~Michelle
Dear Dark Ages,
Remember that time when you slowly moved from your side of the couch to mine? That was awkward, as were many other moments. I hope you used better moves to lure in your wife.
Enjoying the 20/20 of hindsight,
~Michelle
Dear Ralph,
You told me I was funny and I liked that. And I sort of miss how we used to sit near each other (but never together) in Sacrament meeting.
Sad I had to leave that ward,
Michelle
Dear Cleveland,
Thank you for never coming back into my workplace (so far). You were creepy and I don't really want to explain why I never called you...
Not your type,
Michelle